Sahana-The Vakra Sampoorna Ragam

Music has an eternal reach. It helps one in all situations. There are so many emotions involved in each form of music. One form is the Carnatic music which is a system of music commonly practised in the southern parts of India. There are many ragas in Carnatic music.

 I love many for the moods they are associated with and the emotions they create. One such raga, that has touched many hearts is "Sahana". It gives me a complete feeling whenever I listen to this raga. 

Sahana Ragam, as the wiki says is a vakra sampoorna ragam. It has a crooked nature as far as the swaras are concerned, as there is no proper structure followed in the aarokanam and the avarokanam. It is called a sampoorna rag since it has got all the 7 swaras. 

There are many songs that are close to my heart. But the ones in sahana ragam are closer. The songs I like in sahana ragam are:

1. Parthen rasithen... pakkam vara thudithen.. 

2. Intha veenaiku theriyathu

3. Anbe sugama..

And in Carnatic songs, I love these songs..

Vandhanamu Raghunandhana

The mesmerizing effect of this sweet raaga was even more effective when I heard these songs when I closed my eyes and sat on a couch having so many thoughts in my mind on a rainy day. The raaga touched me so much that I stopped thinking about any other matter and started to look for others songs that were based on this raaga.

He-She-It

In the course of Life, strange and weird experiences are no stranger to anyone. To cope with them,or not is left to the individuals experiencing them. 

What if one has agglomerated negative thoughts? How is it going to affect his/her life? Is it worth giving it a thought? What keeps them going beyond a point? Lets try to find an answer to these questions.

Excerpts from a conversation which was misunderstood and misinterpreted due to the cluster of negative thoughts.

He  : I want your opinion in this issue.

She :  What do you want me tell in this regard?

He :  I want to know what you feel about this.

She : I have got no opinion about. It is better unsaid. 

He : Why are you trying to act diplomatically? Why are you like this? You have changed a lot. This is not the person I met and fell in love with. It is very irritating. This is not the first time you trying to be diplomatic. Hereafter, I shall act in the same way as you do when you come up to me for an opinion. Its a lesson to me.

She : If this is what you feel, then I am ready to take it. It is not that I am trying to be diplomatic. I fear that if in future someone comes to know about my opinion, then they might feel bad since this is a sensitive issue.

He : Agreed that this is a sensitive issue. But how could you think that I would ever talk about you like that? The very crux of  our relationship is belief, sharing and being one's self come what may. I sometimes feel that you are not giving your 100% .

She : What? I am not true to this relationship?

(Now, "It" comes to play in her life)

IT : Hey! girl. You are not fit to be in this relationship. You have not been true. You have been a loser all through your life. People have always tried to find fault in you and they have succeeded. 

She : Yes. You are correct. I have not been able to satisfy peopleanything. How will I be able to prove? I am not intelligent, I am not smart. I have not been able to match to his expectations and hence the words "Not 100%" spurred out.

IT : Very true. You have come in terms with me!! Let me guide you. 

(Back into the conversation with him)

She : True. You have pointed out correctly that I ve not given 100%. It hurts. Thanks for everything (cries).

He : Oh! no. I never said that you have not been true. I just wanted to make you understand that you are not giving out your opinion. I ve always wanted you to speak your mind. Nothing else. I am feeling very bad that I've not communicated that properly to you. I cant stand to see you crying. I am extremely sorry.Gotta go. Take care. Catch you later.

She : That is fine. I'll take care. Dont worry.

(He leaves the place hoping that everything will be fine but IT enters again)

It :  Time and again you have been proved wrong. It is impossible for you to be a winner. You are fit for nothing.

She : Yes, I am unfit. I am not going to make it big. Everybody is correct. I am wrong. I ve not been able to give my 100% in anything.

Meantime he tries to catch up with her through mails and messages. He also tries to make her understand that she is worthy enough. But since she is clouded with -ve thoughts, she is not able to lend her ears to any of those explanations given by him. "It" has worked well. Her loneliness has added fuel to the fire. She has aberrated.

(He calls her to make her understand who she is)

He : I am sorry. I dint want to hurt you. I just wanted you to be yourself. I respect your opinion and I want you to be as happy and as chirpy as ever.

(still crying)

She : It always takes time to sink in me. I am not intelligent. I am fit for nothing. This is what I am. From my past experiences, I've learnt not to lend my opinion since I've always been mistaken. I don't want to be misunderstood. 

He : Aha! Now I understand your problem. I am trying to assimilate as many instances to get to know that you are clouded by unwanted thoughts. I've always been impressed by your ability to debate. They've always been a healthy ones. Now I find you in some other world. I can find dwelling in some world of frustration and depression. I fear that you are trying to seclude yourself from the outer world. I am concerned about our future. 

She : No. That is not the reason. Everything is because, I've been mistaken.

He : No. This is not the reason. It is because of the reason that I pointed out. You were not the person who you are now. You have changed. You have argued with me and they have all been very positive. I've always been very happy that you have been able to reason out. You are intelligent enough and you have proved it in the past. You are a talented person. But not streamlining them has led to all these. You have always been very interactive. Now you are not the same person. Come out of your world. This is not going to help you in anyway. Interact with the world. Everything is at your disposal. The world has become small with so many modes of communication. 

Regarding the fear that someone might mistake you, If somebody close to you mistakes you for conveying what you felt, then they are never yours. 

I am feeling bad. I want you to be alright.I want you to think about this. 

( He ends the call and she cogitates. Meantime, It enters her mind)

It : I don't think so what he said is true. You always refrain from telling what you feel. And you are not intelligent as he pointed out. They are just mere decorous words used.

She : No, what he said is true. He has pointed out correctly.When somebody never understands or finds fault in me for conveying what I felt, then how can they be mine? 

I am as intelligent and as competent as anybody is in this world. I've been wasting my talents which I don't intend to do any more. Impossible itself has got "I'm possible". Idle mind has played devil's advocate in my case. I am going to channelise my thoughts and deeds for positive outcomes. I know that it is not an easy task . But I will ensure that I'll never give up my hope. I'll never be complacent and will strive hard to achieve my goal. I have been a winner and I'll be able to win again. I'll not spoil my life by brooding over the past and will make sure "It" never takes over me.

It : Oh! no, I don't think I've got a part to play in your life anymore. I was enjoying your ignorance. But now, I don't think so and have no hope. You've abated me.BOOHOO :(. ( See the negative thought in itself :P) 

Wow!! a ray of hope has entered her. When negative thoughts prevail, the positivity in the environment always fades away and better opportunities cease to be visible. At any point of time, let us not allow the negative thoughts to enter our minds. They just ruin our lives.As they say, Every man is the architect of his own fortune Not that everybody will be booming with positive thoughts, but at least we can be away from the negative thoughts. A small conversation was blown out of proportion because of these crap.This can happen in any body's life. Why should we give room for all this?  Let us take necessary steps to ensure that we don't end up our lives in this crap. More about positive thinking can be expected :) 

Stint abroad

Life in India and Life abroad. As a saying goes in tamil..

Akkaraikku ikkarai patchai... which means, the other side is always greener when seen from this side of a bank.

When one lands on an alien ground, a strange feeling creeps in his/her mind. Some may even deny that. But, many will agree to this fact. What is not there in our motherland? I see many people here trying to get citizenship of an alien country. Is it good? No, I dont think so. I dont find any justification in this regard. People try to convince others for their act by telling that the standard of living is good in these countries.  I dont understand what these folks are trying to convey by the word "Standard". 

I felt like penning down my strong feelings against the feeling of settling down abroad when I came across a couple proudly telling that their children have been admitted to a local school and that they are being taught the local history lessons along with some form of arts like playing instruments. I could also find a few other couples who were happy to get their children admitted to a local school. I felt very hurt on hearing this. I could not digest the fact that these children were learning the history of the country that was ruling us. They were also telling that they were planning to settle down as they found(??!) that the education system here to be much better than the one in India.  If that is the case, then how come  there are many entrepreneurs in our country? 

Many Indians have settled down in foriegn countries, especially, in the countries like UK and US. Eventually, there are many kids, who grow up in foriegn lands without knowing the happiness of being around in their homeland. They are denied the happiness of being with their grandparents and their fellow cousins and relatives. They grow up listening to the likes of their foreign counterparts. Parents generally dont have time to take care of their kids and they get carried away by the so called standard of living, that they forget to impart the culture in these kids.  These children grow up, to only find them standing in the middle of a pond, not being able to move either this side or the other side. The children of these Indian parents, lose their identity.

I am not trying to degrade the kind of living in these countries. It is their way of living. They grow up to be independent enough and start to be on their own at a very small age. The local kids here, drink and start dating at a very small age. Parents dont have the control over these kids. Their main aim is to party and be in gangs whenever possible. I find many teen pubs opened for these young generations. Can this hold good for the Indian kids? 

 In order to get identified among these local population,I find many second generation children trying to cope with this situtaion. They are trying to behave like a local and so they start partying like the other local kids and start to lose their identity. They are neither Indian nor are they accepted as locals by the local population. They are not able to adapt themselves when they come to their hometown on occasional visits. They are not able to enjoy their stay in India.  The best example that can be quoted here is "Dev Patel". The Slumdog star who is brought up in UK, was not able to adjust to the local conditions and the croud when he was  taken to India for attending a family get-together. He is still not able to get over that feeling. 

Life isn't a bed of roses.  Though we can buy anything and everything in the other countries from the food varieties to the cloths, is it possible to buy the time that we spend away from our dear ones? Is it worth earning so much money being away from our near and dear ones? The couples who come down to foreign lands are not able to take care of their parents.  They are not able to help them,when their parents need them during dire situations. Will they be able to get back those precious times? The answer is a blatent "NO" to all these questions.

I am not trying to convey that one should not travel abroad to earn money. I am trying to convey that it is not fair to settle down in a foreign land claiming that those countries have got a better standard. I am also trying to say that we can get together to build a better place to live in India itself instead of setting up wrong examples to our future generations that it is better to live abroad rather than in India.

" India is  a better place to live in and let us all be proud to be Indians. JAI HO "